Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Heart Break Recovery

If you've been heart broken by a lover or life you need time to heal. In terms of lover you need to stay single. It is not a good idea for others to be handling a heart that is broken.

A heart who has met love before can be addicted to love or even the idea of love and it will seek it out hard. It will act as a dying thirsty man or woman who sees water in a mirage. (mirage is a naturally occurring optical phenomenon in which light rays are bent to produce a displaced image of distant objects or the sky.)

So you see attention and mistake it for love. Or you see friendship as a loud mating calling of love. Heart break unhealed will cause more damage to your heart and to those are you.

Then there are those who know your heart is weak and they prey after you. These are the people I do not like. They will use your vulnerability to force you into a one sided beneficial relationship. For money, sex, or attention.

Everyone you've met might not be a jerk perhaps you have a broken heart and you need to recover.

This process is different for everyone. There is no time line or direct answers but being aware of your emotional hearts condition helps so much. I would suggest that you do some emotional heart healthy things.

Exercise your esteem- do things that make you feel good about yourself. Get a new hair cut or color. Take yourself on a trip. Buy the shoes you love. Get your nails and toes done. Cook for yourself the meal you seen on YouTube cooking videos. Show yourself how you want to be treated and deserve to be treated.

Give yourself time - be honest about your current hearts available. Just because you're single doesn't mean you're available. If your still in love with someone else or are still angry with someone else GIVE YOURSELF TIME. It is not fair to you or anyone else to rush into something that you're not available to get your heart too.

Re-Plan your future - more than likely you've had plans with the person. Don't hold anyone to plans that they no longer want to be part of or can't be part of. Discover other alternative plans.

Learn to be okay alone - not to say you'll be alone for ever but if so why is that a bad idea. Being in a relationship isn't the start of your being.

Keep options open - I personally recommend have a few options while meeting people. Do not give any one person all your attention if you have not fully recovered. Be honest with those you me along the way. They too may be in the same place.

Learn sex doesn't mean love!!! Everyone values sex at a different level. But because you have good sex doesn't mean you will have a good relationship.

These things will give your heart a chance to heal.  You'll notice your faults in the heart break and the fault of the other person. You'll notice that you can try it again but you'll admit and declare your non negotiable issues. You'll make sure your lines remain in place until ready and gradually increase the closeness.

You'll then notice you can love again. That you've recovered from a heart break.

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